How does your garden grow?

In San Diego we seem to have spring like weather all year long, so growing seasons overlap. This year we are going to take advantage of this opportunity, by getting an early start with tax returns on their way to fund our garden project. As you'll remember, one of the things that makes me feel blue is wasting a blue sky by being inside. What better way to be outside?! Gardening is not only a fun activity but very productive! It will save money on produce and teach our kids innumerable lessons about nature and the life cycle of plants and the critters that fertilize them. Not to mention we will know exactly what we are putting on our dinner plates. You can find tons of gardening tips and ideas on my Pinterest board "how does your garden grow."  I could go on and on about the benefits of having a fruit and vegetable garden, but I'm more amused by the format that our garden is taking this year...... Do you recognize this infamous symbol?

January expectations vs reality

January has been crazy! I haven't been posting since we moved into our new home because I haven't had the Internet for three weeks. You never realize how much you depend on technology until you don't have it lol.

Let me say right off that so far, my idea of the formal family meeting has failed miserably. My husband kinda thinks its silly and has a hard time keeping a straight face the whole time. I'm brainstorming on how to reinvent this meeting into mini meetings every night at dinner time. Only this time I won't tell the man of the house .. And maybe he won't read this lol!

Our schedules are working out great, the girls even woke me up for school one morning completely ready to go! I've made myself a loose schedule (mostly for cleaning) so that I am more productive during the day. I have planned out meals so that everyone knows what to expect every afternoon, and have an app on my phone that organizes my grocery list by aisle. All of these things have made my household more efficient, and I'm much more relaxed because of it.

One of my personal resolutions was to buy less prepackaged snacks for the kids lunch. I've developed a couple of great cookie recipes and have two rolls if yummy dough rolls in my fridge to make baking them more convenient. Ill be posting those recipes if you're interested. :)

I'm still gradually unpacking and organizing, but I'm limited by money. I've made it a habit to spend a few minutes looking at the free section of Craigslist, and pinteresting frugal repurposing projects. So far I've acquired an old ladder, and one wooden pallet. Updates and maybe even a tutorial soon :)

Lastly, for those who know us personally, you know we are animal people. In our efforts to serve as a family in some way, we have decided animal related service will fit us well. We've taken care of anything from snakes to horses, guinea pigs to rats. We found our new pup at the Humane Society and he's fitting in quite nicely. Once he settled into our routine we found another dog to foster and train until he is ready for his forever home. So far so good! We're really enjoying having animals in our home again, from protection to affection, they bring great things into a family.

Merry Christmas!...Reflection and Expectation

        Whew Tis the season my friends.  I don't know about the rest of the world, but the holidays have also become a time of stress, and strife amongst my children.  I've always wanted a minimalist Christmas, one with a few thoughtful gifts but with a focus on the Christmas story and time spent with family and friends.  Somehow every year we get sucked a little further into consumerist Xmas, with the kids having lists of things they want, and disappointment if they don't get everything. We have had fist fights between my 2 year old and her older sisters about who gets to play with the Littlest Pet Shop kitty first.  Fist fights people. Over a $3 toy.  Somehow, even though I explain to my kids repeatedly that this is NOT what Christmas is about they still insist, and between all of the loving people who are in our lives, they DO indeed get everything on that list. My 5 year old flat out told me that Santa WAS real this year. How do you raise children on the road less traveled when the rest of the world has so much influence on them? These things are what I pondered on while making my list of topics for our family meetings in January.  This is what I have come up with.


Week 1.  Family Rules
   A new home, a new school, a new opportunity to remember what family is all about. I will also explain to the girls that we will not be unpacking all of their toys. Discuss what to keep, what to give away. Introduce the meeting journal and how to use it. (this will get its own blog post :) Family craft with Family Rules.

















Week 2. Clear Expectations
   After a week of adjusting and unpacking, and the first couple days of school, now is the time to settle into a routine.  We'll discuss how we should set up our daily schedules and chores. Organize! Start to discuss how adding animals to the family may change things.  Practice! (organizing ideas)

Week 3. Calm Down
  I expect the newness of everything will be wearing off by now and we may need a reminder of calming techniques. We will take this time to introduce the positive time out, and other strategies for cooling off. Design and name our cooling off destination.

Week 4. Recap
   Discuss how the month has gone so far.  Make needed adjustments.  Celebrate successes.

January | Family Building

So... I've noticed I have started every post with, "So..." I can't believe it took me this long to realize it. I must say it in "real life" too much as well. Mental note, add that to my list of changes in 2013. But anyway, I've decided to highlight each month as it comes, instead of bombarding you with a years worth of goals all in one post. Just thinking about making a years worth of goals gets me flustered.. And well, that would be defeating the purpose :). That being said, what does January have in store for the Giles household?

January | Family Building

This month we will be fully implementing positive parenting as a team , though I've been practicing a little while the hubby was out to sea. If you'd like to read about this wonderful strategy here are a few good resources: Positive Parenting for kids, on Facebook , http://www.positivediscipline.com/, Attachmentparenting.org, my family building board on Pinterest.

What we will be focusing on is setting up weekly family meetings. These will include encouragement and compliments from every member of the family. I will have a loose agenda of basic "lessons" that I would like to introduce, such as house rules, or respect. It will be an open discussion, where the children are actively involved and are able to speak without judgement. It is very important to me that my kiddos feel comfortable in coming to us with any concerns (or compliments!) without fear. This is a new concept for us, and should be an exciting adventure. We will also use this time to plan fun activities for us all to enjoy, and for any family members to bring up things that have bothered them throughout the week.

Another new idea for us to try is the positive "time out." This time out is not to be used as punishment, but as a space where any of us can go when we need to think, calm down, or just relax without being bothered. I'm considering having a few small areas since there are multiple kiddos, and they made need separation time. I will ask the fam what they think would work for them and give them the opportunity to see if their plan works. If it doesn't we can revise, and try again.

In my next post, I'll chat a bit more about concepts I'd like to discuss with my fam during our weekly meetings. What types of things might you discuss during your family meetings? Do you have any favorite activities? Feel free to share here or on Facebook.

Happiness project: More lists!

So a few days ago I was able to pinpoint some very specific things that affected the way I feel. Realizing I had control over most of these items was very liberating. I can change these things, in turn changing how I feel! Obviously, there will always be ups and downs, tragedy and joy, but even in the darkness we have the ability to create our own little light. I condensed my four lists down into one simplified version of things I wanted to make sure to include.

I will make sure to include: music, outdoor activity, less tv, less words, more action, and use my abilities to help others.

I think many of the tasks that I focus on will include one it more of these simplified items. Next, I get to actually plan out my goals for each month!!

Happiness Project explained

So I realized that I may have just jumped into my project without giving any explanation. So let me elaborate. I am not unhappy. I consider myself to be very self aware, and introspective. I love psychology and often read self help books or articles always looking for ways I could do things better, more efficient, or more self satisfying. This summer was a time for self discovery. During my husbands military deployment, my three small daughters and I moved in with my parents to wait out the storm, while receiving support from friends and family. At some point I realized I was wishing my summer away. I was doing whatever it took to pass the time, knowing life would start again when my husband came home. All the while, my children were growing up before my eyes... Time doesn't stop for deployments. We then hit an emotional time in our relationship, both of us feeling the strain of separation. After a bit of a roller coaster ride, we both decided it was time for change. My reading list changed from the rogue angel series to the subject of this life experiment: The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.

To me, this book encapsulated exactly what I was going through. It highlighted how we so often just go through the motions of life, waiting for something to happen. We let feelings happen, maybe we acknowledge them, maybe not. We get through the day, the week, the year. I tend to cycle through my emotions, from happy to busy, to stressed, to discontented, to joyful, and take them as they come and go. I never really thought about how I could contribute to my own happiness. I had been focusing on the happiness of my kids, while neglecting myself for a long time. I'd always heard "If momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy," maybe there was some truth in that . It felt selfish, but it made sense the longer I thought about it. Emotions are contagious, we've all been around people that just radiated joy. Your peace of mind runs off on those around you, in the same way a bad mood dampens a party. So here I am planning my happiness. I will strategically, and sometimes scientifically, analyze my situations and research ways to improve them. I will then test my theories and record my observations and my feelings about the successes and failures. I am ready to recognize what I have, who I am, and what I have the potential to be. Maybe even take a few steps towards realizing that potential. Hopefully, you will come along for the ride. :)

Happiness project: Step one

So this whole journey begins with a few lists. For those of you who know me well, you know this has already spiked my happiness meter. I am a lover of lists. So here we go.

First, a list of things that make me feel good, energized, or joyful:

• Anything to do with music (singing, dancing, playing, listening to my husband play guitar or piano.)
• Anything to do with water (pool, beach, watermark, sprinkler, shower)
• Soccer, or other running games with the kids
• Rough housing in most formats from pillow fights to kickboxing.
• Reading, writing, or watching a good story.
• Naps.
• Chocolate.

Secondly, I tried to list things that made me feel bad, angry, or bored. Surprisingly it was harder for me to pinpoint these things.

• Wasting good weather by staying inside.
• More than a movies worth of tv or video games.
• Constant picking up of toys.
• Arguing.
• Listening to the girls argue.

Next I made a list of things that feel "right" emotionally, psychologically, or spiritually. A list of things that aligned with my own values, morals, or lessons that I want for my family.

• Helping the less fortunate by donating time, money, or supplies.
• Giving, cooking, or entertaining for friends.
• Supporting Creation with "green" choices.
• Giving thanks.
• Helping animals.
• Spending quality time with friends and family.
• Modeling the type of person I would hope my children can respect and aspire to.

Lastly, I thought about ways to build an atmosphere of growth in my home. How can I improve on some of the things I mentioned above. In what ways can we learn, explore, teach, and help?

• Listen to my children. Delve into the questions they have about the world around us.
• Plan trips with or without an agenda.
• Family meetings .
• Expose ourselves to new situations and people.
• Travel to new places, or look at old places in a new way.
• Look closely at things, or look at the big picture.
• Take notes, make observations.
• Share experiences.
• Read.

NEXT STEP: Whatever this is.