Happiness Project explained

So I realized that I may have just jumped into my project without giving any explanation. So let me elaborate. I am not unhappy. I consider myself to be very self aware, and introspective. I love psychology and often read self help books or articles always looking for ways I could do things better, more efficient, or more self satisfying. This summer was a time for self discovery. During my husbands military deployment, my three small daughters and I moved in with my parents to wait out the storm, while receiving support from friends and family. At some point I realized I was wishing my summer away. I was doing whatever it took to pass the time, knowing life would start again when my husband came home. All the while, my children were growing up before my eyes... Time doesn't stop for deployments. We then hit an emotional time in our relationship, both of us feeling the strain of separation. After a bit of a roller coaster ride, we both decided it was time for change. My reading list changed from the rogue angel series to the subject of this life experiment: The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin.

To me, this book encapsulated exactly what I was going through. It highlighted how we so often just go through the motions of life, waiting for something to happen. We let feelings happen, maybe we acknowledge them, maybe not. We get through the day, the week, the year. I tend to cycle through my emotions, from happy to busy, to stressed, to discontented, to joyful, and take them as they come and go. I never really thought about how I could contribute to my own happiness. I had been focusing on the happiness of my kids, while neglecting myself for a long time. I'd always heard "If momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy," maybe there was some truth in that . It felt selfish, but it made sense the longer I thought about it. Emotions are contagious, we've all been around people that just radiated joy. Your peace of mind runs off on those around you, in the same way a bad mood dampens a party. So here I am planning my happiness. I will strategically, and sometimes scientifically, analyze my situations and research ways to improve them. I will then test my theories and record my observations and my feelings about the successes and failures. I am ready to recognize what I have, who I am, and what I have the potential to be. Maybe even take a few steps towards realizing that potential. Hopefully, you will come along for the ride. :)

Happiness project: Step one

So this whole journey begins with a few lists. For those of you who know me well, you know this has already spiked my happiness meter. I am a lover of lists. So here we go.

First, a list of things that make me feel good, energized, or joyful:

• Anything to do with music (singing, dancing, playing, listening to my husband play guitar or piano.)
• Anything to do with water (pool, beach, watermark, sprinkler, shower)
• Soccer, or other running games with the kids
• Rough housing in most formats from pillow fights to kickboxing.
• Reading, writing, or watching a good story.
• Naps.
• Chocolate.

Secondly, I tried to list things that made me feel bad, angry, or bored. Surprisingly it was harder for me to pinpoint these things.

• Wasting good weather by staying inside.
• More than a movies worth of tv or video games.
• Constant picking up of toys.
• Arguing.
• Listening to the girls argue.

Next I made a list of things that feel "right" emotionally, psychologically, or spiritually. A list of things that aligned with my own values, morals, or lessons that I want for my family.

• Helping the less fortunate by donating time, money, or supplies.
• Giving, cooking, or entertaining for friends.
• Supporting Creation with "green" choices.
• Giving thanks.
• Helping animals.
• Spending quality time with friends and family.
• Modeling the type of person I would hope my children can respect and aspire to.

Lastly, I thought about ways to build an atmosphere of growth in my home. How can I improve on some of the things I mentioned above. In what ways can we learn, explore, teach, and help?

• Listen to my children. Delve into the questions they have about the world around us.
• Plan trips with or without an agenda.
• Family meetings .
• Expose ourselves to new situations and people.
• Travel to new places, or look at old places in a new way.
• Look closely at things, or look at the big picture.
• Take notes, make observations.
• Share experiences.
• Read.

NEXT STEP: Whatever this is.

For those of you who have followed me along my various projects, you may recognize this blog.  It has a corresponding Facebook page as well.  For now, I am going to be using it to to record my various ramblings about happiness :) I hope that you will follow, and feel free to comment with suggestions, or details about your own happiness journey. Want to follow on Facebook, or share your story with a group of like minded people? Ask to join my closed group Our Journey Back to Health 
You can also find my related Pinterest board at Journey Back to Health